Self-confidence comes from two areas:
how we see ourselves and what we do with it (thoughts, behaviors)
how we cope with what is going on in our lives.
This is important because sometimes people believe, “If I just think positively about myself, I will feel more confident.” This is a component of confidence, but not the entirety.
When it comes to confidence, our behaviors say a lot.
Here are some examples. Which camp are you in?
When we participate in the low confidence behaviors, it can be self-destructive and will usually show up as negativity. This will start to impact you personally and professionally.
Self-confident people are generally more positive – they typically value themselves and trust their own judgement. They will also acknowledge their mistakes and failures to learn from them.
So, where do you start?
1. Start with appearing more confident. Stand up straight when you are with others, engage
with eye contact as not to seem distracted (bear in mind any cultural differences), and act
as though you are interested.
2. When your mind is getting in the way, it can be important to ask yourself these questions
before you engage with others:
· What do I do well?
· What strengths do other people see in me?
· What threats am I perceiving?
· How can I turn the threats into opportunities?
· What values do other people fail to exhibit?
3. Be prepared. Don’t jump into something without prep work because this only makes you
feel more anxious and will drive your actions accordingly.
4. When something difficult comes, acknowledge it and utilize effective coping strategies
rather than ruminating and allowing the brain to go haywire. {If you need ideas, jump in
my facebook group “Life with Less Tribe”}
5. Quit with the self-critic. My mom always said, “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say it
at all.” Now, I don’t always use this. However, with myself I am a firm believer in being
honest with myself without being mean. I do acknowledge things I do not like about
myself, however, I include what I am going to do to change it at the same time. I do not
allow for problem only thinking.
6. Do something you have been putting off. When you complete something that you have
avoided, you feel accomplished. You might walk taller and feel better about yourself.
Then, repeat.
7. Know your own values and live by them. Do not allow others to dictate how you live your
life.
Be You and the confidence will exude.
Somehow I can’t believe that there are any heights that can’t be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret, it seems to me, can be summarized in four C s. They are curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable. – Walt Disney
~ Terra
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